I've just come across this infographic put together by NICABM. I think it's useful to think about shame as a survival tool and how it leads to controlling behaviour. Understanding your child's shame can facilitate you to meet them with compassion. By supporting them to let go of self-judgement you can help them build up their sense of worth and self-esteem. Identifying guilt and working with an appropriate sense of responsibility is then also enabled, as children no longer become overwhelmed by 'feeling bad'.
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